Friday August 26th

[Big Mike]

Well....I haven't had lunch yet, but will likely head to the corner deli as it's BBQ Tri Tip day.

This topic has been on my mind for a week or two.

Why all the hostility???

It seems there's a big lack or respect, tolerance, and benfit of the doubt lately. It bothers me. There have been a lot of hurt feelings and pissed off Bammers because people either decided to pee in the pool, or just show a complete lack of respect for others and their opinions. Didn't used to be this way.

What's everyone's thoughts on why it's happening, and what are some proactive measures we could ALL take to curb the negativity?

[DanHund]

Went home for lunch today. Had a couple of lunch meat sandwiches and a couple of chicken strips (what can I say, I was hungry).




Just seems to go that way every once in a while. Somebody takes something the wrong way, feelings get hurt. I'm pretty thick skinned, so that crap usually rolls right past me.

[CAFeathers]

Lunch today will probably be a grilled black forrest ham and monterey jack cheese on sourdough bread. YUM!

I have noticed a lot of hostilities also, and from people who would not normally act that way. Can I explain it? No. Does it bother me? Yes.

Maybe we all just need to think about it for a bit.

[johnreardon]

A couple of runny :eek: boiled eggs.

It is very difficult to come across in the written word, so people can take things the wrong way. However, we should all remember it is ok to have different opinions, they are all valid.

Just because a person doesn't like a particular thing, it doesn't mean that their dislike has any more relevance than someone who likes the thing. It would be an aweful world if we all had the same tastes. Variety is the spice of life.

[tms13pin]

What's everyone's thoughts on why it's happening, and what are some proactive measures we could ALL take to curb the negativity?
Leftover soft tacos. Last day off before the semester starts... trying to
get the kids' new bedroom remodeled!

I think it's all about respecting the fact that others have different tastes in
both music and gear, and being cool with that. Its fine to state one's
opinion, as long as it is done tactfully and without the "holier than thou"
attitude for which it is sometimes delivered. And, as Dan states, those on
the receiving end just need to have a thicker skin about these things
sometimes. Life goes on... someone disagreeing with you isn't the end of the
world.

Have a good weekend folks!

--Tom

[drjenkins]

what are some proactive measures we could ALL take to curb the negativity?
Ham sandwich & tortilla chips

Everybody just has to keep in mind we all like different things. And if it's something you dont like, you dont have to slag it. Just agree to disagree, or read the post and dont post a bunch of negative crap in response, there's no need for that. I like coming here to hear about gear and talk to cool people, not argue. Everybody has enough stress in their everyday life, to come to a forum to relax a bit and wind up in a fight. Opinions are all subjective, and should be treated that way. More likely than not, people aren't personally attacking you because they dont share the same opinion. They may be, but sometimes you just have to walk away from the situation altogether.

Dave

[kev]

Awesome homemade lasagna, homemade peach cobbler, and a Coke (yeah, she loves me and I'm a lucky dog).

Why?

August heat


What to do?

All I know is to look to September, sweaters, and crisp, cool night breezes


Kev

[Layne]

Ham/turkey sandwich, Frito chips, and a Dr. Pepper for lunch (a late one at that). Why all the hostility? Not enough gigs! Playing the guitar at gigs makes me happy. Last night I sweated down to my underpants playing a rooftop gig in Deep Ellum in Dallas. I couldn't have been happier; except for maybe some cool breeze or A/C. Sometimes I just have to step away from the computer and play, gig, or do something else to get away. I think everyone should try it! I think you'll find once you come back refreshed from a great gig, performance, or otherwise, you'll be also refreshed to the conversations here. We are a family after all, right?

YMMV,

[Garrett]

Cuban sandwich and a brownie.

I've noticed the increased grumpiness here and on TGP as well. I think a bit of drama is inevitable in any social group. It does seem to come and go in waves.

I just don't read the grumpy posts and end up posting/visiting less for a while until everything cools. I think we all simply need to think before posting.

[Jo]

Left over pizza and a bottle of water.

http://www.netaxs.com/~mhmyers/cdjpgs/full.jpg

[Aldwyn]

Left over pizza and a bottle of water.

http://www.netaxs.com/%7Emhmyers/cdjpgs/full.jpg Hi, Mom!

Sloppy Jo(e). :D

Anyway, I know I have been a little edgy lately... I am under a lot of stress with family issues and work issues, and it's taking it's toll. Not only am I snapping at people when I shouldnt, but I am also more sensitive then I should be.

That's my excuse, and I am sticking to it. Can't speak for anyone else, but have also noted more assholish behavior then usual. It's not the full moon, though... that was a week and a half ago. And usually, the full moon makes me happy. :)

Looking at new age thought, the Earth is entering the sign of Aquarius. Perhaps it moving from Capricorn to Aquarius has something to do with it? If so, we should all start mellowing out soon, and suddenly burst into a creative period.

Of course, if you dont believe in such things, you will get writer's block. ;)

Peace,
Aldwyn

[Peter]

Grilled ham & cheese.

I think there are probably several distinct phases in internet forums. At the beginning, you have a small community where everyone sort of "knows each other" and the etiquette is the same you'd see in a group of friends. Next, there is a phase where the "senior members" become a smaller percentage of the group, but incoming members are welcomed and introduced to the style of the board fairly easily.
After this comes a transition. With too many active members to have the group of friends atmosphere, the tone of the forum will sway in different directions, and as it swings far to one direction, some members will leave and others come in.
One of those directions is hostile. Another: boring. Another: flippant. Another: intellectual. and so on. Over time the center can shift as well. Look at how different the Gear Page is from BaM - even though both came from essentially the same place. With different participators, the overall atmosphere develops in one direction or another.

[gtrcollectr]

Wendy's chicken sandwich and a fruit cup.....

I have seen a lot of this phenomenon lately, some people just love to start arguments. I am on several forums and there are always a few who troll specifically to cause fights. Best think you can do is ignore them and hope that they go away. If not have them banned.

Todd

[bleujazz3]

I've noticed it, too, not only in the Forum but in real life as well.

I attribute it to the end of summer season, where Mom's and Dad's have been shopping for youngsters getting them ready to go back to school. Edginess abounds at this time of year, knowing daycare kids will be bringing home colds and flu, and that travel vacations are coming to an end, at least while school is in session. Last minute prep for secondary and college students, too.
I tend to identify this as the insanity before parents get reacclimated to working and picking the young ones up after school, and back into the regular grind. Resistance by the youngsters doesn't make the parent's job any easier.

If you see yourself in one of the above categories, welcome to my world.
Wake me when it's over.....:eek:

[Greg Jones]

Chicken and Beef kabobs.

Y'all missed the mark completely.

It is quite obviously Dan's fault.

[David Coverversion]

Trout with salad, aubergine and spicy salsa.


This has happened in other forums I've been on the pilot's forum which I was actively involved on a few years ago has degenerated into a total slagging off fest. It's all to do with the anonymity awarded to us all in this medium.

This is still a civilised and friendly forum compared to others.

[irwcustom]

Can't remember.

I particualy enjoy the vibe on BAM myself - there is no other forum like it. Sure people are going to dissagree and have different takes on things. As long as it doesn't get too personal. It's only a hobby / obsession. Sometimes it's good to get a general opinion on something - all critscisms and praises from all angles.

My dad used to always blame the moon for my mums rants and nags ....I used to observe this and indeed - it did seem to go that way at the time. Now I've grown up (a bit!), I realise it's because he was always down the flippin' pub.